The one with the lobster

Tomorrow is the grand opening of the store. Pretty exciting. That meant that today the store was closed in preparation. We had a meeting in the morning and, since I was scheduled to work anyway, I stuck around to help out with things.

I made sure the bar was stocked and ready to go which was about all that needed to be done in that area of the store. The kitchen however had tons to do.

I have probably mentioned before that I’m not much of a cook. Plus? A cashier had been chopping carrots the night before and ended up with stitches and a thumb wrapped up like a cartoon character. Yipes. At least it wasn’t her pinky toe.*

I’m pretty confident with my knife wielding abilities (I did sell them after all) but I think the entire store would like to keep all cashiers and servers away from sharp objects for awhile.

Instead I was taught how to make the ganosh we use in our mocha drinks. Not sure why fire is better than blades but whatever. I survived. Actually making ganosh? Surprisingly easy. We make so much of what we serve in house. It fascinates me.

Not sure why that is so fascinating to me exactly.

I’m easily amused. But that’s a good thing right?

Hush.

After ganosh making I was assigned to plucking herbs for the salads. Brainless work but fun because another barista was doing it with me. We chatted and giggled and had more fun picking through leaves than I would have thought was possible.

Side note: Do you know how freaking long it takes to pick apart and fill up a container with dill? Way freaking long. Seriously, once off the stem, dill has no volume. I worked forever and it looked like I’d just been standing there. Although maybe I was just standing there. I was having an awfully good time chatting.

Anyway, while we were standing there along comes a chef with a lobster. They have lobster dishes on the menu but I didn’t really think about it.

Until the thing moved.

It was still alive.

Now I know, I know, that’s how they’re best and everything but this one looked at me.

And then the chef started petting it’s head to “make it relax”. It’s little eyes rolled around and it stopped flailing and started to look comfortable. It was like a cockroach looking dog. I have never felt so sad for something so delicious in my life.

Then cruuunnnch

And little lobster friend got a knife right through his head.

And what did I, as a rational adult do?

I freaking cried.

No joke.

Thankfully everyone was too busy with their tasks, my friend plucking mint and the chef ripping the still kicking lobster to bits, to notice.

But yeah, I cried over a stupid lobster, from which they’re planning on making lobster egg roll things. Those egg rolls sounded so incredibly delicious. I used to want to try one.

Now I’m pretty sure I’m going to have to pass on it.

If I saw all my food um… prepared? I would definitely be a vegetarian.

Meat is just so freaking yummy.

And I? Am a giant hypocrite.

*name that episode!