SkyWaitress.com

You Only Live Once, This Is How I’m Doing It!

Tag: back pain

“Bigger than average”

Wesley-40-Weeks-Plus-5-Days-Photos-6

We had a biophysical profile ultrasound today. Fluids are good, blood flow is good and he is head down and in an anterior position. Yay.

The tech started the ultrasound by saying, “Oh wow, you don’t have much fluid in there.” and of course my stomach dropped out of my body. Then she poked around and, ya know, actually measured the fluid while I tried not to cry or panic. She then said there was a lot more fluid in there than she thought.

So thanks for the heart attack. Jerk.

Wesley was super stubborn and despite making my stomach jump and bounce all over the place in the waiting room he decided to take a snooze during the actual ultrasound. One of the things they have to look at is movement so she was poking him and shaking him and he would. not. move. I finally asked Joel to talk to him and sure enough, he kicked a few times. Baby boy loves his daddy’s voice.

Wesley-40-Weeks-Plus-5-Days-Photos-2

One thing he would not do was move was his hand away from his face though. So we got a little glimpse of his nose and mouth but that’s it. Every single ultrasound his hands have been up by his head. It’s kind of adorable but I really hope he moves those little hands for the delivery because, no matter how tiny his hands are, I don’t want them to try to fit through me with his head. Ugh.

Also, they estimate he’s 8lbs 2oz. In the words of the doctor he’s “a little bigger than average.”

And yeah, I know the measurements are not generally all that accurate but I’m still kind of freaking my freak over here. Because the measurements can be wrong the other way too. As in, he might be bigger than 8lbs. And he is not coming out yet. And he’s just getting bigger every minute he stays in me.

Excuse me while I faint.

It’s probably a good thing for my sanity that I go to such a laid back OB/midwife practice. Seriously, one visit to a high risk office where they tell me “He’s going to come out all dried out and wrinkled” and, when I tell them I haven’t been contracting much and the ones I have aren’t really uncomfortable, they say “well that’s not going to do anything at all” and it spirals me into an emotional hole.

Yesterday I was all zen. Today I spent most of the day ugly crying and terrified of pushing out a giant baby with a nuchal hand. It was not pretty.

Wesley-40-Weeks-Plus-5-Days-Photos-4

I had a bit of an epiphany earlier this evening and realized why all the advice for starting labor was getting to me so much. I know that the people who give it are trying to be nice and helpful. I’m definitely not mad at anyone for trying to help. It’s just, when people say “try x or y” it makes me feel like I’m not doing enough to get this baby out. Like, if I would have drank more tea or taken more supplements or walked further or had more sex or… or… or… he’d be here already. If I could just find the thing to do or do the thing enough I’d be holding my baby. Every moment I spend lying on the couch feels like I’m failing, even if the reason I’m lying down is because I feel like my pelvis is going to rip in half if I take one more step.

You would think that hearing that my baby is healthy and there are no issues would put me in a great mood. And yet somehow I left that appointment feeling completely terrified, defeated and like a failure. I’m really thankful for my friends on Facebook because they helped talk me down from my hysterics. I’m also thankful for my husband because he really does his best to stay calm and take my roller coaster of emotions in stride.

I know it’s not my fault he’s not here yet. Now if only I could get what I know and what I feel to match.

“Bigger than average”

Wesley-40-Weeks-Plus-5-Days-Photos-6

We had a biophysical profile ultrasound today. Fluids are good, blood flow is good and he is head down and in an anterior position. Yay.

The tech started the ultrasound by saying, “Oh wow, you don’t have much fluid in there.” and of course my stomach dropped out of my body. Then she poked around and, ya know, actually measured the fluid while I tried not to cry or panic. She then said there was a lot more fluid in there than she thought.

So thanks for the heart attack. Jerk.

Wesley was super stubborn and despite making my stomach jump and bounce all over the place in the waiting room he decided to take a snooze during the actual ultrasound. One of the things they have to look at is movement so she was poking him and shaking him and he would. not. move. I finally asked Joel to talk to him and sure enough, he kicked a few times. Baby boy loves his daddy’s voice.

Wesley-40-Weeks-Plus-5-Days-Photos-2

One thing he would not do was move was his hand away from his face though. So we got a little glimpse of his nose and mouth but that’s it. Every single ultrasound his hands have been up by his head. It’s kind of adorable but I really hope he moves those little hands for the delivery because, no matter how tiny his hands are, I don’t want them to try to fit through me with his head. Ugh.

Also, they estimate he’s 8lbs 2oz. In the words of the doctor he’s “a little bigger than average.”

And yeah, I know the measurements are not generally all that accurate but I’m still kind of freaking my freak over here. Because the measurements can be wrong the other way too. As in, he might be bigger than 8lbs. And he is not coming out yet. And he’s just getting bigger every minute he stays in me.

Excuse me while I faint.

It’s probably a good thing for my sanity that I go to such a laid back OB/midwife practice. Seriously, one visit to a high risk office where they tell me “He’s going to come out all dried out and wrinkled” and, when I tell them I haven’t been contracting much and the ones I have aren’t really uncomfortable, they say “well that’s not going to do anything at all” and it spirals me into an emotional hole.

Yesterday I was all zen. Today I spent most of the day ugly crying and terrified of pushing out a giant baby with a nuchal hand. It was not pretty.

Wesley-40-Weeks-Plus-5-Days-Photos-4

I had a bit of an epiphany earlier this evening and realized why all the advice for starting labor was getting to me so much. I know that the people who give it are trying to be nice and helpful. I’m definitely not mad at anyone for trying to help. It’s just, when people say “try x or y” it makes me feel like I’m not doing enough to get this baby out. Like, if I would have drank more tea or taken more supplements or walked further or had more sex or… or… or… he’d be here already. If I could just find the thing to do or do the thing enough I’d be holding my baby. Every moment I spend lying on the couch feels like I’m failing, even if the reason I’m lying down is because I feel like my pelvis is going to rip in half if I take one more step.

You would think that hearing that my baby is healthy and there are no issues would put me in a great mood. And yet somehow I left that appointment feeling completely terrified, defeated and like a failure. I’m really thankful for my friends on Facebook because they helped talk me down from my hysterics. I’m also thankful for my husband because he really does his best to stay calm and take my roller coaster of emotions in stride.

I know it’s not my fault he’s not here yet. Now if only I could get what I know and what I feel to match.

39 Weeks

39weeksbelly

This is my last weekly update before my due date.

Wait, what now?

Could be my last weekly update period if this kid decides to follow in his mom and dad’s footsteps and be born on a 17th. I’ve been discussing it with Wesley and telling him Sunday is his birthday so he better not miss it. St. Patrick’s Day would be a pretty freaking cool birthday. Plus, my favorite midwife is on call this weekend. Not that I mind who catches him that much, we’ve just seen her the most so it would be cool to have her at the birth.

It’s fine if he picks another birthday. I mean obviously.

I would prefer it be sooner rather than later. But also it would be nice if he waits until at least after this weekend because Joel has his dad-chelor party tomorrow. It’s also my nephew’s birthday Saturday and it would be really cool if my little guy could have his own day. Not to mention my nephew would probably be pretty bummed if everyone got pulled away from his party because I was in labor.

So basically I have a lot of opinions about when he comes. Which means he will likely come exactly when I don’t want him to.

Such is life.

We had another uneventful appointment yesterday where Joel captured this,

doppler

which has to be one of my favorite shots of all time. I will never get sick of hearing Wesley’s beautiful healthy heartbeat.

She didn’t check me for dilation again and I’m totally fine with that. If I’m not dilated at all I’ll just be bummed and if I am it could give me a false sense of when things might start happening. There is a tiny bit of me that is curious but not enough to request a check. She didn’t mention if I would get checked at my next appointment (which is on my due date, eek!).

Other than the good appointment, yesterday was a tough day. I woke up, took a shower and promptly puked my guts out. It was a nice little flashback into the first trimester. I remained horrendously nauseated all day, to the point where I couldn’t pull it together enough to go to dance. That was really upsetting, especially since my studio is now on break for the next two weeks. So I guess my pregnant dancing days are over. Sigh.

So now it’s just a waiting game. Joel is incredibly jumpy, which I find completely adorable. I find myself feeling like I need to cling to every second. Every lazy moment, every cuddle with Joel, every moment of sleep. We went to the movies. They asked if we wanted to sign up for a rewards card and we just kind of laughed because who knows when we might be back.

Every wiggle and kick feels extra precious because I know I don’t get to feel them much longer. Of course I can’t wait to nibble on the delicious little toes and knees that have been making my belly dance but I’ll miss feeling him go crazy after I have a Coke or milkshake. I will not miss the nausea or the food aversions or feeling like my pelvis is trying to split in half every time I move, but the kicks? Those I will miss, even the hard ones to the ribs.

39 Weeks

39weeksbelly

This is my last weekly update before my due date.

Wait, what now?

Could be my last weekly update period if this kid decides to follow in his mom and dad’s footsteps and be born on a 17th. I’ve been discussing it with Wesley and telling him Sunday is his birthday so he better not miss it. St. Patrick’s Day would be a pretty freaking cool birthday. Plus, my favorite midwife is on call this weekend. Not that I mind who catches him that much, we’ve just seen her the most so it would be cool to have her at the birth.

It’s fine if he picks another birthday. I mean obviously.

I would prefer it be sooner rather than later. But also it would be nice if he waits until at least after this weekend because Joel has his dad-chelor party tomorrow. It’s also my nephew’s birthday Saturday and it would be really cool if my little guy could have his own day. Not to mention my nephew would probably be pretty bummed if everyone got pulled away from his party because I was in labor.

So basically I have a lot of opinions about when he comes. Which means he will likely come exactly when I don’t want him to.

Such is life.

We had another uneventful appointment yesterday where Joel captured this,

doppler

which has to be one of my favorite shots of all time. I will never get sick of hearing Wesley’s beautiful healthy heartbeat.

She didn’t check me for dilation again and I’m totally fine with that. If I’m not dilated at all I’ll just be bummed and if I am it could give me a false sense of when things might start happening. There is a tiny bit of me that is curious but not enough to request a check. She didn’t mention if I would get checked at my next appointment (which is on my due date, eek!).

Other than the good appointment, yesterday was a tough day. I woke up, took a shower and promptly puked my guts out. It was a nice little flashback into the first trimester. I remained horrendously nauseated all day, to the point where I couldn’t pull it together enough to go to dance. That was really upsetting, especially since my studio is now on break for the next two weeks. So I guess my pregnant dancing days are over. Sigh.

So now it’s just a waiting game. Joel is incredibly jumpy, which I find completely adorable. I find myself feeling like I need to cling to every second. Every lazy moment, every cuddle with Joel, every moment of sleep. We went to the movies. They asked if we wanted to sign up for a rewards card and we just kind of laughed because who knows when we might be back.

Every wiggle and kick feels extra precious because I know I don’t get to feel them much longer. Of course I can’t wait to nibble on the delicious little toes and knees that have been making my belly dance but I’ll miss feeling him go crazy after I have a Coke or milkshake. I will not miss the nausea or the food aversions or feeling like my pelvis is trying to split in half every time I move, but the kicks? Those I will miss, even the hard ones to the ribs.

In which I look ridiculous

AiW300A little over a week ago I got to perform with my dance studio in their hip-hop production of Alice in Wonderland. I was a crazy guest for the tea party.

We’ve been preparing for this for months and I basically had the attitude that if the baby cooperated I would do it. I wasn’t sure how realistic that plan was though since it was scheduled for almost exactly a month before my due date. How many people do you know who perform in a hip hop production at 9 months pregnant?

Yeah me neither.

But dance is my exercise as well as my passion so I learned the dances and just kept an open mind about things. I finally got brave enough to ask my doctor when I should plan to stop dancing (I say brave because I honestly didn’t want to be told I had to stop. Ever.) and got the amazingly hilarious, “when you’re crowning.” response so I fully committed to doing this performance.

I had so much fun.

AiW2

Photo credit DLD Dance Center

I also clearly need to work on being more expressive.

Joel put together a little series of clips of my parts in the show.

I wish I could show you the whole thing in it’s entirety but it’s not my choreography or my music. The songs we danced to were Tea Party by Kerli and Outta Your Mind by Lil Jon feat LMFAO if you want to use your imagination.

Dancing at nine months pregnant is not something I recommend for the faint of heart. After dress rehearsal the day before and then the performance I was in a lot of pain for few days. Like, walking like a 90 year old woman, pain. I also felt completely ridiculous with my giant belly. Luckily as part of the crazy tea party I was supposed to look ridiculous so that worked out.

Funny side story. Backstage was nothing but concrete floors and metal chairs and I knew my back couldn’t stand hours of that on top of the dancing so I brought my own comfy lawn chair. I was supervising some of the kids back stage and of course they gave me a bit of a funny look when I pulled my own chair out so I said something along the lines of, “growing a human is hard.” Later I grunted or something while standing up and one of the little girls said, “Was that because you’re growing a human?” with a look of concern. I about died laughing. Kids are the cutest.

Anyway, I only had one person tell me that they were worried my water was going to break while they watched me perform so I guess, win? I hope I inspired someone or at least made them smile with my ridiculousness. If nothing else I had a blast and did not give birth on stage. That is a definite win.

In which I look ridiculous

AiW300A little over a week ago I got to perform with my dance studio in their hip-hop production of Alice in Wonderland. I was a crazy guest for the tea party.

We’ve been preparing for this for months and I basically had the attitude that if the baby cooperated I would do it. I wasn’t sure how realistic that plan was though since it was scheduled for almost exactly a month before my due date. How many people do you know who perform in a hip hop production at 9 months pregnant?

Yeah me neither.

But dance is my exercise as well as my passion so I learned the dances and just kept an open mind about things. I finally got brave enough to ask my doctor when I should plan to stop dancing (I say brave because I honestly didn’t want to be told I had to stop. Ever.) and got the amazingly hilarious, “when you’re crowning.” response so I fully committed to doing this performance.

I had so much fun.

AiW2

Photo credit DLD Dance Center

I also clearly need to work on being more expressive.

Joel put together a little series of clips of my parts in the show.

I wish I could show you the whole thing in it’s entirety but it’s not my choreography or my music. The songs we danced to were Tea Party by Kerli and Outta Your Mind by Lil Jon feat LMFAO if you want to use your imagination.

Dancing at nine months pregnant is not something I recommend for the faint of heart. After dress rehearsal the day before and then the performance I was in a lot of pain for few days. Like, walking like a 90 year old woman, pain. I also felt completely ridiculous with my giant belly. Luckily as part of the crazy tea party I was supposed to look ridiculous so that worked out.

Funny side story. Backstage was nothing but concrete floors and metal chairs and I knew my back couldn’t stand hours of that on top of the dancing so I brought my own comfy lawn chair. I was supervising some of the kids back stage and of course they gave me a bit of a funny look when I pulled my own chair out so I said something along the lines of, “growing a human is hard.” Later I grunted or something while standing up and one of the little girls said, “Was that because you’re growing a human?” with a look of concern. I about died laughing. Kids are the cutest.

Anyway, I only had one person tell me that they were worried my water was going to break while they watched me perform so I guess, win? I hope I inspired someone or at least made them smile with my ridiculousness. If nothing else I had a blast and did not give birth on stage. That is a definite win.

31 Weeks

Just wanted to start this post by saying a huge thank you to all of you who signed and shared the petition from yesterday. Plus all the wonderfully thoughtful birthday wishes. It made my day incredibly special. If you missed yesterday’s post, please sign and share this petition to help my friend with a debilitating condition. She really is amazing and I want to do anything I can to help her.

31weeksbelly

Anyway, this week was pretty low key, which was actually nice. Joel and I had no plans for the whole weekend, other than our regularly scheduled Bradley Method class on Sunday night. That meant a lot of lazing around and soaking up some of our last times together before our world is rocked by this little guy inside me.

joelandmecuddling

Bliss. Seriously.

Joel is getting more comfortable with talking to our little guy through my belly. It took him awhile, which is understandable honestly. I mean, if I want to talk to Baby Boy I can be as goofy or silly or serious as I want in privacy. Joel on the other hand has to talk to him in front of me. I can see how it would be awkward to know what to say. I generally try to be quiet and let them have their own time but we were trying to get Baby Boy to move for a video (seriously, it looks like alien sometimes already) and I managed to snap this during that time. It’s completely candid, he thought the video’s focus was on my belly and he certainly didn’t know I was taking a picture within the video.

joelandbelly

My heart practically explodes when I see it.

This kid is so strong. I know I mentioned it last week but it still surprises me. The other day he poked his head out so far into my hand it actually made me gasp out loud. Seriously, I’m surprised I couldn’t see his facial expression. He is also quite opinionated. He goes nuts after I take a shower. Not sure if the hot water wakes him up or he’s protesting it ending or he likes the massages he gets when I lotion my belly but no matter what time of day he has some of his most active times after I take a shower. His other most active time is when I go to bed. He often has strong opinions about which way I lie down. He has protested me laying on my left or right side so hard that I’ve had to roll over. Sometimes neither side is okay with him. Of course I’m not supposed to lie flat on my back and the whole, one hip propped up with a pillow position, can really kill my back. So going to sleep at night is… fun. Thankfully he has yet to really wake me up from kicking. My bladder takes care of the waking me up part.

My lower back has been feeling better thanks to this sexy thing.

maternitybelt

I know, down boys.

But seriously, if you’re pregnant and experiencing lower back and hip pain I highly recommend purchasing one. My pain was to the point of me barely being able to walk by night time, and that’s when I took it easy during the day. Joel’s nickname for me is Ducky and let’s just say I earned it with my pregnant “swagger.” With this belt things have gotten way better. I didn’t wear it yesterday and I noticed a huge difference. I only wear it around the house because it’s a bit uncomfortable without a layer of clothing between it and my skin and it’s not exactly the fashion statement I want to make. Still, it’s been a lifesaver. This is the one I have. This isn’t sponsored and that’s not an affiliate link, my mom gave it to me for Christmas. I just really like it so I thought I’d pass on the information.

This weekend should be a lot of fun. I’m going out tonight with Joel to celebrate my birthday (since he had work and school all. day. long. yesterday) and tomorrow I’m celebrating with my family. Because just one celebration for my birthday? Psh.

26 weeks

So, exciting news, I haven’t taken a pill since last Friday. That’s a whole week! I am so freaking excited. I’ve still been nauseous which is less than fun but I haven’t actually gotten sick. I didn’t say anything online all week because I didn’t want to jinx it but I think I can declare myself officially weaned off the anti-nausea medication. Wee!

I’m feeling way bigger this week. My grandpa lovingly tells me I’m getting fat every time I see him. If it were anyone else on the planet that would probably make me burst into tears but somehow my grandpa can say it and it comes off as endearing. He’s a special man. Joel also kindly pointed out that I’ve started to waddle a bit sometimes. This is due to my lower back pain so it’s not all the time but now that he said it I’ve started to notice myself doing it. It concerns me a bit that I’ve started pregnant walking already because I feel like I have such a long way to go. I’d love to find a chiropractor in my area but since we have an HMO I’ve put off going through that process. I’d also love to find one that uses an activator as that’s the technique I was raised on but that might be asking too much. If anyone in the Chicago area has a suggestion though I’d love it.

This week I found out something that kind of surprised me. I don’t hate it when people I know touch my belly. I really thought I would but honestly? I kind of love it. Now, I have yet to have a stranger do it. I’ve joked that if a stranger comes up and touches my stomach I’m going to just do it right back to them. We’ll see if I’m brave enough if/when the time comes though.

Other than that it’s been a relatively low key week and that’s fine with me. I know the holidays are zooming towards me and that will be it’s own form of crazy. And of course I want zero excitement at all times pregnancy wise. I have felt occasional tightness which I can only assume are braxton hicks contractions. They’re never painful or remotely regular but they sure are a strange sensation. I also get paranoid every once in awhile because I read too many stories online and if I don’t feel Baby Boy move for a while I get nervous. Of course as soon as I get nervous he starts doing acrobatics and proves I’m just driving myself crazy and should probably stop reading Baby Center and other blogs. But I’m already addicted so too late.

When I said I was going to do these updates once a week I planned to do more than just these updates. I have a few stories from early in the pregnancy sitting in my drafts and a rather funny experience trying on clothes from last week so I’ll try to get some of those up between these updates.

Powered by WordPress & Theme by Anders Norén